At Peace

It's been a bit stressful around here since we arrived back in Cincinnati. My lack of up-to-date blog entries is usually indicative of stress or weariness in my life. I've had a bit of both. It's hard to be creative when your heart is heavy.

I've found over this past week or so that getting fed up is good and begins healing. Anger is not always bad. Telling the person who makes you angry is a really good thing, and goes a long way toward forgiveness, whether or not they think they are in the wrong.

Right now, for the first time in well over a year, I feel at peace in my own home. Tonight, I know for sure I will not wake up and be angry about the washer and dryer going at 3am. Tonight, I know for sure I will not wake up and smell stinky, fried food cooking at 1am. I look forward to seeing my loved one's face, and not the metal sticking out of it. I will no longer suffer the consequences of others when they do stupid things. I am back, and I am backed up. I do not feel there are two sets of rules in our home anymore.

I know all five members of the Dutton household will be eating the dinner I prepare this evening. I know all five members of the Dutton household will be sleeping in our home, in their own beds, no matter how reluctantly. Because if they want a bed in which to sleep at this address, then common courtesies will be followed by every adult in our home. I'm back, and I am backed up. I do not feel there are two sets of rules in our home anymore.

We're not the coolest parents around, but we are what we are. Our values may be more conservative than many families, but we are who we are. We do the best we can with what we have out of love for all of our children. I'm back, and I am finally backed up! I do not feel there are two sets of rules in our home anymore! My home and family isn't perfect, but it's mine. And it is finally peaceful.